Ha ha, I'm so happy that someone is ill. Wicked, wicked me. No lah, just a fever! If anything more serious, I would be worried for her.
See, I'm physically and mentally spent, and if she isn't forced to take a break, I would have been the one to break down. Hell, she's been working at breakneck speed and yours trully, (being her 'highly-paid office-maid' & a decade older than her) have been huffing and puffing along. My neck hasn't broke yet but my other body parts have taken some harsh beatings, resulting in all kinds of aches - stomachache, headache, armache, legache, fingerache, every which ache. I just feel so shagged by office rigmaroles.. (damn, you wish it were the raunchy shag by the dudes of LOTR (Orlando Bloom) LOST (Josh Holloway), even the good old 007 (Pierce Brosnan) .....what the hell... hallucinating... in dude-dom..... drool on ......oo oo ooah......@#%$^&^@ loud thud..on the butt...get back to work lah .:-(
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Friday, August 12, 2005
WFR
The company's into another on-going exercise code named WFR.
Three letters that spell fear, joy or relief because they gotta announce Which Farker Fellow to Release!
Man, if you're on this Work Force Reduction head-roll call, you'll probably start shedding tears (yes, I heard from HR that some guys actually wept when handed their letters in previous exercises) if you belong to one or more of the following categories:
- got wife, children, father, mother, dog, cats to feed (last 2 at least can give away);
- loan instalments to pay off;
- long-term medical bills;
- 101 other monetary commitments;
- skills that can't cross over to other sectors;
- jobs suited to your skills have thousands competing for them;
- not easily retrainable;
- of that age that ageist employers deem unemployable;
On the other hand, you would be secretly gloating or openly grinning from ear to ear ('cos the 'goodbye' package is among the better ones in the industry) if you belong to one or more of the following groups:-
- already planning to leave anyway;
- working for a boss from hell;
- suffering from burn-out;
- already planning for early retirement;
- have no straggling financial commitments;
- best of all, already have a job offering elsewhere;
- don't even need to work in the first place (lucky devil, u!) (then again, why were u depriving someone more in need of a job then?)
A blessing in disguise, you would say, and can't wait to blow that corporate goodbye kiss.
When has the world ever been fair?
Pubic Fashion
Someone call the fashion police, quick!
This MRT commuter wore such low-rise pants that her exposed pubic hair raised many many eyebrows. Can the fashion police charge her for indecent exposure?
Clueless fashion slave, gross fashion faux pas!
Heard of the brazilian wax? No? Just do the good old-fashioned shave or pluck (ouch!) or cover up if you can't take pain.
Hairy bozos, watch that wardrobe malfunction, lest you stimulate shocks on the Harrys, Dicks & Toms in public.
This MRT commuter wore such low-rise pants that her exposed pubic hair raised many many eyebrows. Can the fashion police charge her for indecent exposure?
Clueless fashion slave, gross fashion faux pas!
Heard of the brazilian wax? No? Just do the good old-fashioned shave or pluck (ouch!) or cover up if you can't take pain.
Hairy bozos, watch that wardrobe malfunction, lest you stimulate shocks on the Harrys, Dicks & Toms in public.
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
Peeves
Some people have pet peeves. Duh! Who needs peeves for pets?
Whatever, I hope the following peeple do not cross my path again:-
RUBBISH DUMSPTER
Peeple who put their rubbish in plastic bags & get mother, son, daughter help lug one each down to the lift landing and dump it outside the lift door!
I asked this well-saried English-speaking woman why could'nt she discard the bags downstairs and she gave an asinine reply that she didn't know where. At least she did not spout rubbish when I said it was dangerous to leave them at the lift door landing as it might catch fire. She stayed dumb.
DRIVERS WHO IGNORE PEDESTRAINS AT ZEBRA-CROSSINGS
Drivers who do not stop at zebra-crossings (pedestrain crossing where right of way is accorded to the pedestrain). Don't tell me you stop only when you see a zebra! Cameras should be installed at some of these crossings, especially the one near my home and next to a primary school. Many a times, drivers simply ignore me and just drive on even when I wear striped clothing! Once, I had already crossed over to the midpoint of this 2-way lane and the car coming from the other side blatantly drove past. The next time, I'm going to jot down the vehicle number & report it.
HUMAN SKUNK IN MRT TRAIN
I hopped into a jam-packed MRT train one morning rush hour and found myself smouldered by this foul smelling odour coming from god-knows-where. Other commuters with hands pressed against their noses were looking about to see where the skunk was. The obnoxious odour refused to diffuse even when the door opened at each station. Every time the door closed, that breath of fresh air got immediately sucked up by the overpowering stench. I might have fainted (yes I could hardly breathe in the contaminated air) if the next interchange had been too many stations away. Thankfully, it was just 2 stops away from where I boarded and when the crowd dispersed,I scampered towards the middle of the less crowded train, a good number of carriages away.
I hate it now that I've to join the rush hour MRT crowd just so I can get to office in time to catch these US folks before their work day ends over the other side of their continent.
PEEPLE WHO PEE IN LIFTS
These peeple either do not have toilets at home or suffer from incontinence, or are just simply animals in human clothings. But then, even dogs do not water down any ground they trod on.
Whatever, I hope the following peeple do not cross my path again:-
RUBBISH DUMSPTER
Peeple who put their rubbish in plastic bags & get mother, son, daughter help lug one each down to the lift landing and dump it outside the lift door!
I asked this well-saried English-speaking woman why could'nt she discard the bags downstairs and she gave an asinine reply that she didn't know where. At least she did not spout rubbish when I said it was dangerous to leave them at the lift door landing as it might catch fire. She stayed dumb.
DRIVERS WHO IGNORE PEDESTRAINS AT ZEBRA-CROSSINGS
Drivers who do not stop at zebra-crossings (pedestrain crossing where right of way is accorded to the pedestrain). Don't tell me you stop only when you see a zebra! Cameras should be installed at some of these crossings, especially the one near my home and next to a primary school. Many a times, drivers simply ignore me and just drive on even when I wear striped clothing! Once, I had already crossed over to the midpoint of this 2-way lane and the car coming from the other side blatantly drove past. The next time, I'm going to jot down the vehicle number & report it.
HUMAN SKUNK IN MRT TRAIN
I hopped into a jam-packed MRT train one morning rush hour and found myself smouldered by this foul smelling odour coming from god-knows-where. Other commuters with hands pressed against their noses were looking about to see where the skunk was. The obnoxious odour refused to diffuse even when the door opened at each station. Every time the door closed, that breath of fresh air got immediately sucked up by the overpowering stench. I might have fainted (yes I could hardly breathe in the contaminated air) if the next interchange had been too many stations away. Thankfully, it was just 2 stops away from where I boarded and when the crowd dispersed,I scampered towards the middle of the less crowded train, a good number of carriages away.
I hate it now that I've to join the rush hour MRT crowd just so I can get to office in time to catch these US folks before their work day ends over the other side of their continent.
PEEPLE WHO PEE IN LIFTS
These peeple either do not have toilets at home or suffer from incontinence, or are just simply animals in human clothings. But then, even dogs do not water down any ground they trod on.
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